Thursday, August 4, 2011

Sad + Anti-Climatic.

Scotland is like a hat. Have you ever seen a picture of England, and looked at it, and said, "Hmm. What a fashionable hat England is wearing." Because I sure have. Scotland is, without a doubt, England's fashionable hat. And Edward King of England looked up on this fashionable hat and said, "WHY ISN'T THIS MINE RAAAARGH." So he went up to his fashionable hat and said “I AM THE OVERLORD OF SCOTLAND.” to the king.
Uhmyeah.
So this led to many years of battle between England and Scotland.
Sooo now Ed decided to say, “Oh, forget the king. Lets just get three men to rule over Scotland instead of that old guy.”
That didn’t go over to well.
Everybody hated this, especially Sir William Wallace. So he decided to raise an army of commoners.
Now when Ed heard about Wallace, he didn’t really care. Ohurdur how cute. LETS TEAR ‘EM TO PIECES.
So Ed sent the royal English army to head over there. And guess who won? William’s army won.
So Ed payed a lot more attention. He went back into the country (He wasn’t even there when he sent the army to tear William to pieces.) and watched. So he sent more army on ‘em, and the army won. /lesob
But the army didn’t get William. So he went into hiding, rallied up an army, and spent his life on the run. ON TEH LAM. He did that for about 7 years.
But the he got caught and was severely tortured and was executed for treason.
Well then.
BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE!
After William was killed, there were other patriots. One of the most famous is Robert Bruce. He signed allegiance with the king of England. But then he sided with William and crowned himself king of Scotland. Uhm. Ok then. And he would’ve been killed, but he wasn’t found out. But in a battle with the English, he faked his death and decided to flee to the mountains in Ireland. Now this was not a cowardly move. He was plotting, scheming, and all that jayazz. So eventually, he came back to Scotland, and in about 2 years he had all of Scotland again. YAYZ :D
But then Bruce decided to get a little bit of England too. By this time, Ed I was dead. So Ed II was who Robert had to fight. So eventually Ed II died, so, you guessed it, ED II CAME ALONG. Who was a nice guy and decided to acknowledge Robert’s power and he let him be king of Scotland. King Robert I in 1328 :D
BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE!
He only got to be king for a year D: He died after a year.
So that ended sadly and anti-climatically.

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