I CAN'T TITLES ANYMORE FORGIVE ME.

so were gon talk about the jews today

and LET’S DO A QUICK OVERVIEW.

SO THE JEWISH PEOPLE THE ISRAELITES LOST THEIR LAND THIS ONE TIME. ISRAEL. THEY LOST IT. COULDN’T FIND IT.

THEN IN 70 A.D. THE ROMANS BLEW UP THE TEMPLE OR SOMETHIN LIKE THAT.

AND THEY WENT TO MASADA. THEY. BEING. THE JEWISH PEOPLE. BUT. BUT THEY DIDN’T REALLY SURVIVE BECAUSE A BUNCH OF OTHER JEWS THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA TO CIVIL WAR BUT THAT WAS STUPID

AND THE MIDDLE AGES SUDDENLY TURKS REMEMBER THEM AND THEN THE CRUSADES. WHEN CHRISTIANS FOUGHT MUSLIMS. THIS FAILED MISERABLY. YAY CHRISTIANS.

THEN THE JEWS STARTED DOING PRETTY WELL. OK. SOME. MOST DIDN’T. A LOT OF PEOPLE KINDA HATED THEM.

AND NOW WE’RE IN THE RENNAISANCE. RENNISANCE. RENAISSANCE. THERE.

so a lot of people were pretty mean to the jewish people. which. wasn’t nice. well duh that was really unnecessary uh.

so this one time in 1606 these portugese monks that were really nice decided it’d be a great idea to massacre a bunch of jews wait what

and then these people in italy just kinda grouped all the jews in this one place called a ghetto.

OK GUYS, YOU CAN LIVE HERE, AND WE’RE GOING TO CREATE THIS NICE AND PRETTY LITTLE PLACE FOR YOU GUYS TO LIVE OK SOUNDS GOOD.

no it was TERRIBLE.

5,000 gravestones of jews were gotten rid of in germany so they could build other stuff with them. and 800 had to leave the country. 800 people, that is. not. not 800 tombstones.

yeah.

nobody really liked these people. at. at all.

Except for the Ottomans! They were pretty nice to the Jews over there.

And in India, a ghetto was destroyed just because!

oh wait no that isn’t a good thing at all uh

and this one african place also got invaded by the spanish and they got rid of a bunch of ghettos

and ivan the terrible killed over 300 people just because they were jewish

uh

and pope paul the fourth had a bunch of ghettos and locked them all in there at night and wouldn’t let them have more than one synagogue and made them all wear the same clothes and

welp

In Mexico, 200 or so were burned at the stake. 10 people in Peru were punished for being Jewish. and in 1615, all the jews were kicked out of france. the english had been lead to believe that the jews were money counterfeiters and child murderers by a man named William Pryne. Remember him? Yep.

10 years later, the Russians murdered and tortured 34,000 people. Because they were Jewish.

OK BAD THINGS ARE OVER BEGIN READING HERE IF YOU DIDN’T READ UP THERE.

There were some places in the world were people loved the Jews! Morocco was like HEY GUYS C’MERE IT’S FINE OVER HERE.

And remember Charles V? The Holy Roman Emperor? Yeah. He was cool with them being in the Netherlands. And in Poland, the Jews were actually given a charter of freedom. And about half a million lived there by 1648.

wow.

Suleman liked Jews, too. He was like HEY GUYS YOU WANT GOVERNMENT POSITIONS I’LL GIVE THEM TO YOU. BECAUSE I LOVE YOU.

Denmark was also cool with them. There was a big giant Synagogue in Amsterdam. And in England they were welcomed back eventually. And most of the colonies in North America were like HEY GUYS WE NEED PEOPLE BECAUSE WITHOUT THEM WE’LL DIE.

The jews also worked. Really. Really hard. And they also had a big focus on family and customs and stuff. AND THEY ALSO HAD THEIR OWN LANGUAGE THAT THEY MADE. CALLED YIDDISH. WHICH YOU’RE PROBABLY AWARE OF. LIKE. YEAH. I DON’T KNOW?????

So the Jewish people were also still hopeful. Yeah. Even though they were like. Really. Really oppressed they kinda.

SO. I’LL. AWKWARDLY.

END.

END THIS.

HERE.

SOME IMPORTANT THINGS YES GOOD TITLE PURITANS ARE COOL

SO THE PURITANS.

AND THE SEPARATISTS.

they werent happy with the church.

the Church of England, that is.

AND THE SEPARATISTS SAILED OVER HERE TO ‘MERICUH AND SUDDENLY PILGRIMS

so what about the puritans

These guys were the ones that wanted to fix the Church. And some of them did sail over the America. The Boston.

AND THEY DID THAT BECAUSE JOHN

all dese johns uh

THEY DID THAT BECAUSE WINTHROP.

k das beter

SO THIS GUY WAS ENGLISH.

and so about the time that winthrop here was old enough to like make his own decisions suddenly king charles

who didnt like puritans

at all

or the separatists

BUT BASICALLY JOHN DIDN’T WANNA BE A SEPARATIST

But if the Puritans kept. Like. Being Puritans. Then they could get in trouble

SO THE IDEA OF LEAVING THE COUNTRY STARTED SOUNDING REALLY NICE.

winthrop and some other guys went up the king charles all like hey can we just like leave so we can

uh

fish

that is the only thing were gonna do were just gonna fish ok

SO CHARLES WAS LIKE YEAH SURE WHY NOT GET OUT

And before anyone ever actually left they picked Winthrop to be their governor.

das coo

AND THEN THEY WENT TO SALEM. IN 1630. WOW LOOK ITS A DATE REMEMBER THIS STUFF

1630

THEY LEFT ENGLAND. IN THE SPRING.

this was a really really really big group of people ok

the biggest, actually.

like. seriously. 700.

which was a lot. it was the largest one that had ever sailed at the time ever.

BUT

so they left derp

They were pretty good at the whole living thing though. Because they were really nice to each other. HEY WE SHOULD ALL BE PURITANS what ok anyway

So John preached some before they left. And a lot of people heard. And then a lot of people were like THESE GUYS ARE PRETTY COOL WE SHOULD LEAVE THE COUNTRY TOO.

yeah.

BUT AFTER 72 DAYS AT SEA THEY FINALLY GOT THERE

and were really confused because there were only some huts and some tents on the beach

which werent really enough for 700 people

and there were only 82 people living there because over half the population had died or left

whoops

BUT IT WASN’T THE END OF THE WORLD BECAUSE THE PURITANS WERE REALLY HARD WORKING PEOPLE UNLIKE THOSE IN JAMESTOWN. LIKE. IT WAS LITERALLY A PART OF THEIR RELIGION TO WORK. THEY WERE LIKE. YEAH LETS WORK. EVERYWHERE. ALL THE TIME.

yeah. forget that idea about becoming puritans uh

AND THEY WERE REALLY SUCCESSFUL.

and in the fall he moved to boston. which he helped build.

SO YOU KNOW HARVARD

6 YEARS AFTER THE PURITANS GOT THERE THEY BUILT IT

6 YEARS

6 YEARS

THAT IS REALLY REALLY FAST OK.

education was also really really important to the puritans also. like. these werent the LOL CANT READ OR WRITE BUT WORK REAL GOOD people no they were really smart also

das real coo

also this law that was made in the new world was pretty cool too i think

If a town has 50 families, they needed a teacher. To teach the students about Christianity.

And it was called the “Old Deluder Satan Act”

welp

THIS IS ACTUALLY P COOL GOOGLE IT SERIOUSLY IT’S AWESOME

and the puritans were also pretty cool. a lot of people don’t really get that? they’re like THEY WERE BORING AND STUCK OP no man the puritans were rad ok

SO WHAT ABOUT THE INDIANS.

Basically they were also pretty cool with the Indians. They shared Christianity with them and everyone was pretty happy. They also continued on surviving, and John Winthrop was elected governor ELEVEN TIMES

the Puritans in the new world went up to TWENTY FIVE THOUSAND

yep

basically

they did everything pretty well.

the end.

I'M BACK AND STILL AWESOME AT TITLES.

SO THIS GUY

HE LIKED GRAVITY

but we are not talking about sir isaac newton no not yet

WE ARE TALKING ABOUT GALILEO GALILEI

galgal was born on the same day the michelangelo died. yep.

AND WHEN HE WAS LITTLE GALGAL WAS PRETTY GOOD AT THE GREEK AND AT THE LATIN AND AT THE ART AND STUFF

and basically when he got older galgal realized that he likes science a lot.

so he went to this university. in pisa. like. as in. the leaning tower of pisa.

BUT HIS FAMILY DID NOT HAVE ENOUGH MONEY TO LET HIM FINISH HIS STUDIES.

so he just started a self study in math

and he invented this thing

CALLED THE HYDROSTATIC BALANCE.

and that is the thing that measures the specific gravity of an object in water. das p. cool ok

AND WHEN HE WAS 25 HE WENT BACK TO THE UNIVERSITY OF PISA.

Butttt he was not a student. He was a teacher. A math teacher. Yeah.

AND WHILE HE WAS TEACHING, HE CAME UP WITH HIS MOST FAMOUS THEORY CALLED THE LAW OF FALLING BODIES.

now dont freak out about this ok

bodies means like

anything.

not necessarily like bodies bodies like corpses but like ok nevermind i’ll go over here.

BASICALLY HE SAID THAT EVERYTHING HITS THE GROUND AT THE SAME TIME. IF THAT MAKES SENSE. Like. You drop a 10 pound ball and a 1 pound ball at the same time and they hit the ground at the same time.

HOWEVER MOST PEOPLE DID NOT LIKE THIS THEORY.

He even got kicked out of his university at one point. Uh. Yeah. So he moved to a different one! And eventually he kinda went past Francis Bacon in philosomeness. And actually doing the work. He did a bunch of stuff like connected math and science together. And Philosophy.

AND IN 1609 HE MADE A TELESCOPE.

At least, he made it strong enough to see stars. see them well, at least.

AND HE LIKED TO LOOK AT THEM A LOT. AND HE ALSO NAMED SOME STUFF. like. some planets. like. four of the moons of Jupiter. And Galgal also realized that the moon did not give off it’s own light.

THAT’S PRETTY COOL. BECAUSE. REALIZE THAT EVERYONE EVER THOUGHT THAT THE MOON WAS IT’S OWN SOURCE OF LIGHT. LIKE. NOBODY EVER HAD THIS IDEA. EVER.

he also realized that the moon was bumpy. instead of smooth. like aristotle thought.

GALGAL ALSO MADE THE FIRST COMPOUND MICROSCOPE. YEAH. THAT’S PRETTY COOL. And he also made a thermometer. And a cannon which was better than everyone elses.

AND A DINGLE HOPPER.

Er. A fork. And a comb. At once. Like. A fork-comb. Even though forks are already like combs but like i guess if you were /really busy/ you could

comb your hair

and eat

with your

fork comb.

ANYWAY. GALGAL HAD THE UNFORNTUNATE TIMING TO LIVE AT THE SAME TIME THAT THE CHURCH HAD A LOT OF POWER. MEANING. THEY DIDN’T LIKE GALGAL A LOT. AT. ALL.

and then in 1632 some stuff happened

that

made the catholics really mad

because ok so Mr. P-to-da-ope asked the galileo write a book about heliocentric vs. geocentric solar systems

and one of the people in this book was kinda really obviously supposed to be the pope

and the book was kinda pointing to the heliocentric view

and made the geocentric view look stupid

SO THEY PUT HIM ON TRIAL BY THE INQUISITION.

His ideas were considered heresy! Yay!

HOWEVER, THE INQUISITION WAS MORE LENIENT.

NOTE: SOME PEOPLE BELIEVE THAT HE WAS TORTURED. THIS IS FALSE. HE WAS FINE. HE WAS JUST IMPRISIONED FOR LIKE A YEAR AND HAD TO TELL EVERYONE THAT HE WAS WRONG.

yep.

they were nicer to heretics by now.

so also in the last few years of his life he kinda went blind

he turned to music instead.

then we went deaf

welp.

and.

and then he died.

uhm.

THE END.