his name was pascal
BLAISE PASCAL
he was homeschooled but not by his mom but by his dad
ANY HOMESCHOOL DADS? MM?
anyway so his dad was kinda derp and made him master language before he did math or pretty much anything else
HE WAS KINDA WEIRD LIKE THAT, BUT HEY.
but anyway blaise was like
PFFT FORGET THAT I’MMA DO ME SOME GEOMETRY
and he did him some geometry
BUT HIS DAD DID NOT LIKE THIS
even though blaise figured out some cool stuff daddy was actually pretty cool with it???
HE WAS GIVEN A GEOMETRY BOOK BY EUCLID
euclid hahahah ok uhm sorry nobody knows what im talking about /because if you did you would have said something about robert boyle/ uh
SO BLAISE WROTE AN ESSAY ON SOME COMPLICATED MATHY STUFF
which is basically all of math but whatever
AND IT GOT DISCOVERED BY A GUY YOU KNOW NAMED RENE DESCARTES
he did not believe that little 16 year old blaise wrote it
BUT LITTLE 16 YEAR OLD BLAISE /DID/ WRITE IT.
and it was about something that is now known as pascal’s theorem
AND PASCAL’S THEOREM IS REALLY REALLY COOL GUYS
i mean if you’re a math geek which i am not i’m sorry
BUT IF YOU ARE A MATH GEEK, YOU SHOULD CHECK IT OUT BECAUSE WIKIPEDIA CAN EXPLAIN IT BETTER THAN I AND I CAN'T JUST COPY AND PASTE A PARAGRAPH OK IT'S COMPLICATED I THINK.
anyway then blaise (blaise just sounds cooler than pascal k) went and did something important
HE INVENTED THE SIMPLE CALCULATOR
yep it was all steampunky and everything
NOBODY REALLY LIKED IT BECAUSE THEY WERE AFRAID OF
but he was on to something big ok but it just took some time to catch on
BUT ONE THING PEOPLE LIKED WAS HOW MUCH HE UNDERSTOOD PRESSURE
im going to guess that math geeks also find this stuff cool but like i said /i am not a math geek i cant numbers/
LIQUIDS IN A CONFINED VESSEL CARRY PRESSURE IN ALL DIRECTIONS AT THE SAME RATE
lolidk
THIS MADE PUMPS AND ELEVATORS AND COMPRESSORS A LOT BETTER BECAUSE REASONS
and he even had a unit of measurement named after him
HIS OWN LITTLE MEASUREMENT WAS CALLED A PASCAL
but one this he was confused about was how a barometer worked
SO HE TOOK HIS BROTHER AND TOOK A BAROMETER AND PUT THEM AT THE BOTTOM OF A MOUNTAIN. THEN HE PUT HIM ON TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN.
yep
HE FIGURED OUT THAT AIR PRESSURE DECREASES WITH AN INCREASE IN ALTITUDE
but the problem was he was lonely
AND HE DID STUFF THAT PEOPLE DO TO NOT BE LONELY
meaning he joined the rich and famous people!
HE WAS A REALLY GOOD GAMBLER THOUGH BECAUSE HE KNEW HOW TO MATH
so he was pretty rich
LIKE HE WAS A CARD COUNTER IF YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS
and he developed a theory of probability
THE THEORY OF PROBABILITY IS REALLY BIG OK OK.
and he also invented the wristwatch
INVENTING THE WRISTWATCH WAS NOT REALLY THAT BIG OF AN ACCOMPLISHMENT BECAUSE ALL HE DID WAS TIE HIS POCKET WATCH TO HIS WRIST WITH A PIECE OF STRING
lets give this man an award
THEN HE HAD A NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE!
his horse drawn carriage fell off a bridge
WHILE HE WAS RECOVERING, HE READ THE ENTIRE GOSPEL OF JOHN.
and then he pretty much converted
HE WROTE DOWN HIS TESTIMONY AND SEWED IT INTO HIS COAT LINING SO THAT HE COULD KEEP IT CLOSE TO HIS HEART
awh ouo
HE SHIFTED HIS FOCUS FROM MATH AND SCIENCE TO SPIRITUAL SHTUFF
then he joined a convent?????
YES A CONVENT LIKE FOR NUNS????
it was not a traditional convent as you can guess
THIS CONVENT WAS FULL OF JANSENITES
now who the heck were these people
THE JANSENITES WERE ROMAN CATHOLICS WHO BELIEVED IN GRACE AND PREDESTINATION
they were like the puritans of the catholics kinda
THEY WERE PRETTY MUCH SHUNNED MOST OF THE TIME
however they still continued on with stuff
THEN HE WROTE SOME STUFF CALLED THE PROVINCIAL LETTERS
these were wildly popular in france and are considered some of the best french prose ever written
ANYWAY SO HE HAD A BOOK PUBLISHED CALLED PENSEES
that is the french word for thoughts
THE BOOK WAS ABOUT HIS THOUGHTS
wow shocker
HE DIED EVENTUALLY, PROBABLY FROM STOMACH CANCER.
well
THE END.
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