PERSECUTION AND OPPRESSION IS SCOTLAND FUN TIMES

K SO LET’S TALK ABOUT SOME PEOPLE DYING

sounds like fun right

WRONG IT ISN’T FUN. BECAUSE OPPRESSION. IN SCOTLAND.

k but first let’s rewind a bit

ENGLISH CIVIL WAR. THE PEOPLE WERE DIVIDED BETWEEN ROUNDHEADS AND CAVALIERS. CAVALIERS LIKED THE KING, ROUNDHEADS LIKED THE PARLIAMENT.

so pretty much the roundheads won and charlie was killed and olive was kinda a king sorta protector guy

AND CHARLIE’S SON WAS ALSO NAMED CHARLIE

and he’s who we’re talkin’ about :D

NOW SOME PEOPLE THINK THAT THE RIGHTFUL KING OF ENGLAND AND SCOTLAND WAS CHARLES II.

because england and scotland were both ruled by the same king because reasons

HOWEVER NOBODY REALLY WANTED HIM TO BE KING SINCE HE WAS KINDA AN ENEMY TO THE ROUNDHEADS

so charlie v 2.0 was kinda in hiding right now since a lot of people wanted to kill him

AND HE SPENT A LOT OF TIME WITH REGULAR PEOPLE

like he was pretty much a servant for people sometimes

AFTER ABOUT 40 DAYS HE WENT TO FRANCE AND FOUND HIS MOM

and they went into hiding together welp

AND LOUIS XIV WAS KING AT THE TIME

i bet you remember him don’tcha

SO HE LIKED THIS GUY A LOT SO HE GAVE HIM SOME MONEY AND CLOTHES AND STUFF

and then charlie went to brussles for a while!

THEN OLIVE DIED AND HIS SON KINDA TRIED TO TAKE OVER BUT HE STUNK AT IT

so charlie was like “hey uh can i just”

BECAUSE THE LORD PROTECTOR GUY THINGY POSITION WAS NOW HIRING

so after like forever of arguing over kings and having wars about kings and yes kings no kings /no kings/

PARLIAMENT ACTUALLY CAME UP TO CHARLIE LIKE “HEY I JUST MET YOU AND THIS IS CRAZY BUT THE THRONE IS EMPTY BE OUR KING MAYBE”

yes i came up with that myself it was hard be proud

SO A BUNCH OF PEOPLE WERE TOTALLY OK WITH THIS.

i’m serious a lot of people really liked this

THIS WAS CALLED THE ENGLISH RESTORATION

because england was being restored

AND THE ENGLISH WERE NOW LIKE TOTALLY COOL WITH AN ABSOLUTE MONARCH

ok let’s fight and kill people and ruin our country for a while and then we’ll get our way /and totally change our minds after that./

NOW CHARLIE WAS KINDA SIMILAR TO LOUIS OVER HERE WITH HIS PRETTY WIGS AND CLOTHES AND PALACES AND STUFF

but he was different from him because he was familiar with regular people

AND EVERYONE REALLY LIKED HIM. THE PARLIAMENT AND THE POOR PEOPLE AND THE RICH PEOPLE AND EVERYONE WAS PRETTY COOL WITH HIM BECAUSE HE WAS COOL WITH THEM.

now hang on just a minute

I STARTED THIS WITH TALKING ABOUT DYING AND WE’RE ALL LIKE WHOOP YAY KINGS WHAT IS THIS

well you see even though he was cool with a lot of people there was this one group who he dumb dumb stupid dumb

HE WAS PRETTY TOLERANT OF EVERYONE /EXCEPT THE SCOTTISH PRESBYTERIANS./

charlie

wat r u doin

charlie

stahp

BECAUSE THEY HAD KINDA HELPED KILL HIS DAD SO HE DECIDED REVENGE WAS A-OK.

and this guy thought he was the head of their church???

EVEN THOUGH THE OFFICIAL HEAD OF CHURCH WAS ACTUALLY GOD SO UH.

and then this guy decided he’d take over as head of the church of scotland

AND MADE IT ILLEGAL TO HAVE A COVENANT THAT STATED OTHERWISE.

uh

THAT MEANS HE KIDNA SAID “HI PRESBYTERIANS YOU DON’T REALLY EXIST ANYMORE KTHNX”

charlie no this isn’t

HE WASN’T EVEN INTO RELIGION OR ANYTHING TO BEGIN WITH

so now he decided he wanted more power so

SO HE STARTED PERSECUTING THESE GUYS

and they were about as willing to die for their cause as charlie was to kill for his

THAT’S A GREAT MIXTURE RIGHT

now these people were pretty smart though

YOU SEE, THEY WERE JUST NOT ALLOWED TO MEET IN CHURCHES. SO THEY JUST DID THEIR STUFF OUTSIDE.

it took a while for people to catch on

BUT WHEN THE POLICE /DID/ CATCH ON, AND THEY DECIDED IT WAS A NICE IDEA TO KILL ANYONE WHO DID THIS.

nice

SO EVERYONE JUST WENT AND GATHERED LIKE IN THE FOREST AND HILLS AND AWAY FROM EVERYTHING WHERE NOBODY WOULD FIND OUT

and then yeah a lot of persecution

AND THEN THINGS GOT WORSE.

the next king, james IV, just kinda decided that he wanted to get rid of all presbyterians

HE WAS PRETTY HORRIBLE

a few months when he ruled were actually known as the “killing times.”

GUESS WHAT THAT MEANS.

pretty much what you think it means

A BUNCH OF PEOPLE WERE KILLED.

however, a lot of pretty cool stories came from then which i heard this guy named google can tell you if you ask

and

the

post

ends

awkward and abruptly